I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
