butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
