I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Randomize
