How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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