if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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