good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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