His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
