I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize