There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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