When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I have grass duct taped all over my body
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
