im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
