When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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