I just made out with a guy for $7.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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