She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
