WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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