HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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