Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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