Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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