Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
