Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Randomize