Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
