Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
