Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
