i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize