READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
