Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
