So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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