Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
