And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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