I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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