I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
