he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
