plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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