is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize