Come see our sink grown plant.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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