What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
