I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
