Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
