How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My penis needs a shock collar
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
