This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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