I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
you would pick up someone in the library
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
