Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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