I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Can I color on your dick again?
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
