We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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