Hey man sorry I got all grabby
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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