Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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