Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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