please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
We have so much sex to catch up on
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
the liver wants what the liver wants
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Randomize
