I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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