school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
