its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
