why didn't you poke me back
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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