so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
